POPQuiz #2 Results: The Vladdest of the Vlad
The target? Vampire-inspired technology. The results? Right here.
Photo by ActionVance on Unsplash.
POPQuiz #2 Results: The Vladdest of the Vlad
Thanks to everyone who submitted their vampire-inspired patent findings for POPQuiz 2. We had a lot of fun looking through them. It did took us a little while to sort through your answers and decide which submissions were the Vladdest – but here they are.
RECAP, BEcause it’s been so very long
Vampire hunting is serious business, and it takes a fair bit of energy, which evidently was poured into your submissions.
Here’s an excerpt of the original challenge:
We are looking for Dracula-inspired patents that maximize a highly arbitrary score we’ll call the VI, also known as the Vlad Index, or Vampire Index.
In this challenge, we’re not looking for an answer we already think we know. Instead, we want to know what you can find.
The Search Parameters
1. We are interested in patent and patent documents that relate to the acquisition of vampire-like superpowers (non-limiting examples: shapeshifting, mind control, levitation, immortality or extraordinary longevity). You may find this compilation on Wikipedia a helpful reference.
2. We wish to find patents and patent documents on the subject that maximize the VI – that is, the document’s connection to the themes that inspired this challenge.
You can read the full background on the original challenge here. We posted some interim results a few weeks ago, and if you feel like checking out what high VI social media might look like, check out our other post as well.
And now, for the REVEAL…
our top 3 Submissions
A Vampire Count (Game), Recently Deceased
Submitted by Mikk.
For the sheer volume references to vampires, vampire clichés, mentions of vampire lore, and groan-inducing vampire puns…this single patent had the highest VI of your submissions.
Mikk submitted US6158742A “Vampire count hide and go seek game”. Mikk’s method to retrieve the high VI patent involved a combination analysis in PatentInspiration using following keywords: vampire, dracula, immortal*, cross, fly*, blood, mirror, garlic, bat*, death*.
This granted patent, which is deceased, is a vampire-themed hide and seek game enhanced with narration in a “Transylvania” accent, sound effects including “blood-curdling screams”, and the anxiety of your fellow players succumbing one by one to horrifying vampire-themed puns. The named inventor on this patent, a David Ersell Platt, then of Bountiful, Utah, briefly owned a company called Bite Incorporated, which was presumably formed to market the game.
Vampire Hunters. Death. And Fashion.
Submitted by Manuela Popescu.
Yikes. There were a lot of dead vampires in US3818100, the patent we’ve linked to the button below.
Manuela suggests that the method described within might have helped Guido take care of his bat problem this August – if those bats had been actual vampire bats. Manuela’s submissions ranked in our top 3 due to the collective VI of her submissions. Bats count for a lot. Manuela is also Romanian, so VI points there.
US3818100 was Manuela’s highest VI document. It discloses a method for causing the demise of vampires, and documents the death of about 2000 – vampire bats – in the specification. So death, blood-feasting, and bats: lots of them. I’m sad about all the dead bats, but I learned something interesting today after reading about them: vampire bats share food, and they will actually regurgitate blood meals to feed to other bats in their colonies.
Manuela submitted several other items, including some items that any style-conscious vampire might enjoy: a fashionable necklace, some custom-fit teeth, and the fine coffin whose image accompanies this text – perfect for those sunny days in. The best part about the coffin patent – aside from the design that allows one to stack several coffins efficiently (handy if you’re accumulating a lot of vampires) – are the assignee names associated with the citing documents…Ash Ghoulmore and Ravin Crossbows. Oh, and the inventor of the coffin was one Donald W. Nutting.
I am entertained. Thank you Manuela.
Still Creepy, After All This Time…
As mentioned in our interim post, Henk Pattyn contributed several documents as candidates.
You’ll recognize this document from our interim results set for this challenge.
It’s hard to deny the vampiric qualities of this patent. The “everything but the laboratory sink” nature of this patent meant it didn’t have the most mentions of vampire lore. However, any proposal to rejuvenate old people by infusing them with blood extracted from children, babies, and young people is definitely strikingly Vlad.
Over-the-top VI points for blood-curdling ickiness.
immortality, GAMES, and Dance moves
It’s hard not to want to list all the weird and wonderful things our POPQuiz challengers submitted to this quiz, even if they didn’t make our top 3. The patent literature hides a lot of really weird things, so if you find yourself needing distractions one day perhaps you should check some of the submissions below.
RU2010105950 - Method for Increasing Human Life For Centuries (according to an automated translation)
This was submitted by Hideaki Hashizume, who submitted a long list of patent documents, mostly on the subjects of immortality and telepathy. This one was my favourite of Hashizume’s list, although they were all a little strange.
Appareently, you can take it with you.
Just make sure you show them RU2010105950.
I don’t read Russian, so I had to rely upon an automated translation for this one. This one touched on a kind of immortality, but less of the “life extension by sucking someone’s blood” kind but more of the “human gets reincarnated” kind.
As far as I can tell from an automated translation, this invention isn’t meant to solve the problem of reincarnation itself – that appears to be taken as a given – it’s more about “how do I get to keep all my stuff”? The abstract suggests a method for identifying the reincarnated person so that they can receive the property of the officially-but-not-really-dead person. I’m wondering whether the procedures to identify the Dalai Lama might have been cited as prior art. I’ll leave the exploration of the file history to people who can actually read Russian.
US20120136403 Medically perpetual persistence of essential human life
Neurons. Sort of. Image by Gerd Altmann from Pixabay
This one also comes from Hideaki Hashizume . Again, it has to do with immortality. I would argue that the kind of immortality in this document is less reminiscent of vampire lore than it is of science fiction stories such as Altered Carbon. This application went through its own series of reincarnations, with the original application being filed in 2010 and eventually being abandoned. It goes in great detail about a technique to transfer the brain activity patterns for one human brain to another human brain. It’s an interesting read.
Have a clone and a method to download your consciousness into it? Why not check out this document? If it doesn’t get revived, it’s public domain. Someone needs to write a guide for public domain resurrection methods.
US7118107 Role-playing game with interactive cards and game devices, namely in the form of linear and rotary slide rules, novel use of dice, tactical combat, word-based magic, and dynamic attrition.
This one came from IP_Octopus, and if you’re a gamer, you might enjoy checking out the creators’ website at https://www.audaxcor.com. There you’ll see many images from the patent, except as part of the game guides, and there are several free downloads of a sample game for those who are interested in the game itself.
Oh, and look: a bonus photo of the inventors!
US5255452A Method and means for creating anti-gravity illusion
Inventor and friend, a portrait in ceramic. Image by Vardan Sevan from Pixabay
Poonam Thakur submitted several documents relating to the idea that vampires often seem to have magical powers – especially the kinds of powers having to do with levitation. This one in particular, however, is worth mentioning for the inventor (or one of them, anyway), and the fact that the invention was used in real life. Can you guess the identity of the first inventor?
Poonam also kindly provided a link to the story behind the patent. It’s a fun read.
It’s worth noting that the first inventor on this patent was also known for spending time in a hyperbaric chamber, claiming that it could help him live to “at least 150”. It didn’t, sadly, but that’s another story.
Strange. The hyperbaric chamber looks rather like a glass coffin. Some definite VI point upgrades here, Poonam.
All right. Back to the crypt for now…
Wow. Those were a lot of high VI documents.
I don’t know about you, but I’m feeling a little drained right now – and I didn’t even get to the high VI index patents Guido found. I’ll leave you to explore those on your own: search for the inventor Isao Kajisa, and scan at least a few of the 90 or so patent documents associated with that inventor name. Resurrection, elixirs of life, cyborgs, freezers for dead people. And more.
Don’t let anyone ever tell you that patent searching is boring.
We know better.
Want more? Check out the original post for POPQuiz 2 here, and the interim results list here. And of course, remember you can come to Bucharest and really immerse yourself in the land of Vlad at Patent Olympiad 2019. Time to register is running out!